‘Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen’
~ Michael Jordan
Life can throw all sorts of challenges at us every day. At times these challenges can start to feel too much and we can get into a situation where we start to feel overwhelmed and unsure of the way forward. What we must remember is that whatever comes our way, however tough it is, we are in control of how we respond. It can be empowering to understand that although we can’t control what happens in our lives, we can control how we deal with it.
To win at life, try following these tips:
1) Be confident to be you
Don’t worry about what other people think of you. Often we judge ourselves by considering other peoples views of us. Your own thoughts and opinions are what matters. Try not to be a people pleaser. Know what you stand for and who you are and stay strong to that.
Try defining your own personal principles to be clear about what it is you believe in and take comfort in staying true to yourself.
2) Face your fears head on
Most people carry around with them a heavy burden of unconscious fears. These fears can prevent us from reaching our full potential and living a life without worry. Tackling your fears head on can help to minimize them and keep them under control. You can do this by carrying out a fear inventory.
A fear inventory is the process of moving all the subconscious thoughts and fears that we have roaming around in our heads, into our conscious minds. When we carry out a fear inventory, it enables us to bring our fears to the surface, allowing us to see them more clearly and to deal with them accordingly. When we see them written down in front of us, we should find that it creates the space to address them and makes them seem less significant and overwhelming.
3) Take action
Don’t spend your time living in hope, wishing and dreaming that things were different, instead take action. Stop feeling that the world owes you something, instead make things happen for yourself. Follow your passion. Don’t expect it all to come easily, you need to put in the hard graft.
Rather than waiting for things to happen, make them happen. Take the first step towards your goal, no matter how big or small, its a step in the right direction and that’s what matters.
4) Let go of toxic relationships
There are some types of people in life who I like to call “Dementors.” You know the ones I mean, the people who suck the life out of you when you spend time with them, and drain away all your positive energy.
Learn to remove those people from your life and focus on surrounding yourself with awesome people instead. This should have an amazing positive impact.
5) Embrace change
Stability can create a feeling of comfort. Although this can feel safe, it can also keep you stuck where you are, without moving forward. Instead of staying static, plan change, initiate change and drive change. Don’t let things happen to you without your say so, be part of the change, shape it and embrace it.
6) Focus on your circle of influence
There are things that you can control in your life and those that you can’t. Analyze your circumstances to identify what is in your circle of influence and what is outside it. Try not to waste energy focusing on that which you have no control over. Instead let go of those things and focus all your effort on the things you can do something about. This is a much better use of your energy.
7) Make the most of now
Live for the present. Try not to dwell on the past and what might have been. Learn from it, but don’t live in it. At the same time try not to obsess about the future and what might happen at a later date. Try not to constantly look forward to a future time when you think you will be happy. Instead, live in the moment and make the most of now.
8) Practice gratitude
It can be hugely motivating to feel gratitude for everything you have in your life. Rather than feeling sorry for your self, or grumbling about what’s not going right in your life, practice being grateful for what you do have. Write a list of everything that you are grateful for, keep it accessible and then look at it when you need to.
You can make this into a daily habit and start a gratitude diary. Gratitude doesn’t always seem to come as easily as complaining does, but when you focus your energy on it, it can be hugely powerful.
9) Learn from your mistakes
When you do something that you wish you hadn’t, don’t spend unnecessary time worrying about it, or justifying your decisions, instead accept responsibility for it, learn from the experience and ensure you don’t make the same mistake again. Think about what went wrong and how you can approach it differently next time to avoid the same thing happening in the future.
It take’s guts to admit you are wrong but it’s a critical step in learning and developing yourself. If you are courageous and take responsibility for owning your mistake, you can turn it into a learning opportunity rather than viewing it as a disaster.
10) Spend time alone
Spending time on your own, is different from being lonely. Learning to be comfortable with your own company can help you to clear your mind and gives you time to think and focus on what is important to you. It also allows you to spend your time doing exactly what you want, rather than pleasing others.
Anxiety of being on your own can come from your worry about other peoples perception of you being alone. Don’t worry about what other people think, make time for yourself and use this time selfishly to do what you enjoy. Be with your thoughts and focus on yourself. Use this time to grow, learn and develop.
I’d love to hear from you in the comments below about how you win at live and whether any of these tips help you.
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